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Massage Parlors: An Investigative Report

Massage Parlors: An Investigative Report

What's a guy have to do to get a hand job in Koreatown? NATHAN JORDAN INVESTIGATES

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By Nathan Jordan
In cities across America, massage parlors are often well-known fronts for major prostitution operations. Much like the recent epidemic of illegal sexual activities solicited through Craigslist, it seems that police and city authorities have turned a blind eye to the activities in these sleazy establishments.

 

As Chief Moral Correspondent at CraveOnline, I have decided to use my own money and resources to investigate this disgusting practice. Today I’m going deep-cover, posing as a “tourist” to expose this heinous, illegal underground institution. What follows is a blow-by-blow account surreptitiously posted live online throughout my investigation. My findings are quite shocking.

 

In disguise as a "tourist."

 

December 16th. 9:00 AM. Susie’s Massage - Downtown Los Angeles

 

I’m in full disguise as a tourist as I visit Susie’s Massage, a store-front establishment in downtown Los Angeles. I’m appalled that such sordid activities can take place in the middle of a major financial district. I ask the receptionist for the “daily special,” and I’m taken to a small room with burning candles where I am told to take off my clothes. I’m pretty sure I’ve struck pay-dirt right away. Susie, if that’s her real name, comes in and performs something called a “deep tissue massage.” It certainly crosses my personal boundaries with all of the touching, but there’s no inappropriate sexual contact. The massage costs me $100, which should be a crime in itself.

 

10:30 AM. Magic Hand Massage Clinic- Los Feliz

 

On to the next massage parlor. The set up is very similar to Susie’s Massage. I’m once again asked to get naked, but they send me “Larry,” if that’s his real name. I’m ready to get out of there right away, but don’t want to blow my cover. I’m sure these massage parlors have some sort of underground communication system that alerts everyone when they’ve been infiltrated. Fortunately, Larry makes no attempt to relive me. This costs me another $125.

 

These perverts wait for a reach around.

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