Overwatch’s Tracer is Gay and Here Are Some People Who Lost Their Minds

Some particularly delicate flowers are struggling to cope with Overwatch's Tracer being gay.

Paul Tamburroby Paul Tamburro

Blizzard revealing that Tracer is Overwatch‘s first LGBTQ hero is a welcome move, with the time-travelling British gunslinger being the face of the game’s marketing and, as such, a bold choice for its first queer character. While it wasn’t exactly a surprise that Blizzard’s blockbuster FPS features a gay hero, with the developer previously stating that the shooter actually has “multiple” LGBTQ characters (though the rest have yet to be revealed), right-minded people were still pleased with their championing of diversity. But not everyone felt that way.

After the big “reveal” in Overwatch‘s latest comic, in which Tracer is depicted sharing a Christmas kiss with her girlfriend, many took to Blizzard’s official forums and the Overwatch subreddit in order to furiously explain why this, in their backwards-ass opinion, is not okay. The curious thing about bigots is that despite their thoughts resembling the kind of mad ramblings you’d expect to find scrawled on a public bathroom wall in excrement, they have no problem with sharing them with others for everyone else to point and laugh. As such I dived into forum discussions regarding the Tracer comic, pulling out a selection of the most absurd opinions these morons farted out from whatever occupies the space in their head that is typically reserved for a brain, and have compiled them for your viewing (dis)pleasure.

Take a look at some of the incredibly salty reactions to Tracer’s gay relationship below:

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In the most 2016 comment imaginable, this guy somehow manages to shoehorn the EU referendum into a comment in which he also debates whether same-sex video game characters should be kissing or cuddling.

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See-saws require a lot of balance, and are probably more tailored towards this guy’s demographic.

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Lesbianism is SO POWERFUL that it can actually render a video game literally unplayable. It’s a little-known fact that part of the Gay Agenda™ is to get rid of class-based first-person shooters.

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Finally we can talk about the important things, like which Overwatch hero has the prettiest Christmas outfit.

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The incest at least explains why this guy’s suffering from a critical intelligence deficiency.

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“Anyone here over 35 who is so cripplingly alone that they’re rendered inconsolable by a fictional character enjoying a better romantic relationship than they do?”

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You may laugh, but it is a British thing to passionately kiss your friends on the mouth as a greeting. You should see how they say goodbye.

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Those damn feminists, comin’ over ‘ere and makin’ the world more hospitable for minority groups! *Kicks an orphan in the leg, punches puppy*

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This guy raises a point; gay is okay now, so why should we have to include more gay people in our entertainment? Gay’s fine, everyone, so much so that there’s really no need to represent them whatsoever in the media. Being gay is so widely accepted now that it’s best to ignore homosexuality altogether, and when it does reappear, we must shout at it until it disappears because it’s so a-OK that we shouldn’t acknowledge that LGBTQ people even exist.

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“Political agenda” in this instance meaning “literally just being gay and existing.”

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If only there were other video games in which you could play as a straight white man.

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Coincidentally, in the same comic Tjorborn was also depicted as having a wife. Despite this commenter insisting that they would also have an issue with Overwatch‘s characters being in straight relationships, I couldn’t find a comment in which they had bemoaned this reveal. HOW STRANGE.

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It’s a little-known fact that Donald Trump was elected to the White House because a game involving a talking scientist gorilla unrealistically features a gay relationship. In his inauguration speech he reportedly plans to discuss the lack of balancing in Overwatch‘s competitive mode, Hanzo players being “UUUUGE fuckin’ scrubs,” and why Xbox One controllers should be smaller to accommodate his tiny hands.

Overwatch-T-14

“I don’t want politics in my video games,” says a guy who just wants to go back to killing people in war games that he believes have no political context whatsoever. D’you think if we showed him Battlefield 1 his brain would explode and splatter across the wall of his mother’s dimly lit basement?

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This individual would have only been comfortable with Tracer being gay if Blizzard left a trail of homosexual breadcrumbs throughout Overwatch. They have no problem with Tracer being gay, though. Not at all. I mean, they don’t believe the same amount of forethought should be put into Overwatch‘s straight characters, but they probably have a very good reason why they don’t believe this should be the case. They haven’t articulated this reason in favor of sounding like a complete idiot, but I’m sure there’s a reason behind that, too.

Overwatch-T-16

I like to think that this guy’s life is essentially an Escape Room of homosexuality, where he’s simply trying to find an exit but all the while he’s being barraged by those pesky gays preventing him from doing so.