By Ted Hucklebuck

When you spend as much time on "teh internetz" as I do, then you tend to see a lot of the same things after awhile. No matter how hard people try to be “random” (as in “OMG Pirates? How random! lol!”), eventually even the most unusual topics will become commonplace.

Which is what happened to pirates at least 100 years ago. Even so, people that are new to the intertubes persist in making pirate themed references even to this day.


Yeah, and that fat ginger bastard didn't pay them to be there either, right?

This is why I have decided to create this handy guide to acceptable referencing on the interwebz. As I have previously stated, pirates are out. So what, you may be wondering, is the new pirate? Well obviously ninjas are the new pirates, I would inform you. “But Mr. Huckelbuck, aren’t ninjas kinda played out too?” you might ask. After smiting you with my 15 sword of Grondor for speaking out of turn, I would inform you that you are correct, and in actuality, lolcatz are the new ninjas.

The buck obviously doesn’t stop there though people. Everyone knows that the moment your aunt Debbie in Montana emails you an lolcat, the fad is now officially dead. Thankfully zombies have have risen from their graves stepped (or skulked, or dragged, or loped, or whatever the hell you wanna call it) in to take their place.


Starring Corey Feldman as "Rapist Cat".

The problem with zombies, though, is that they too have been so thoroughly referenced that they have joined the ranks of pirates and ninjas in the bottom of the “randomness quotient” barrel. The final “head shot” most likely came at the hands of Max Brooks, whose “Zombie Survival Guide” may as well have been sold at the counter at Starbucks, it was so prevalent at the time of its release.


An army of dorks dressing like zombies in public for no reason, I shit you not.