3. CAPTAIN PLANET AND THE PLANETEERS (1990-1992)

Way before Al Gore was scaring us with the end of the world Captain Planet And The Planeteers were fighting for the environment in this stupid cartoon designed by Ted Turner. Let’s forget for a minute that a corporate giant whose company moves in co-ops everything then colorizes it is preaching about the ills of the world that way we can focus on how bad the show is all on its own. You think the drugs were powerful for Bravestarr, you ain’t seen nothing it.

Essentially a spirit of the Earth sends five rings down that have the ability to control five elements. This spirit, named Gaia, does this so there can be a human defense system against those out to destroy the environment. Obviously the best qualified for such a gigantic responsibility is a group of teenagers. Gaia uses her “planet vision” to find the worst of the polluters and the kids go off to do battle. When the Planeteers individual control of the elements isn’t powerful enough they combine their strengths and become Captain Planet, kind of a tree hugger Superman.

If put into the hands of somebody trying to do something other than shill a product this might have worked but under Turner’s watchful eye it fails miserably. The scripts try and deal with serious issues in way too simplistic except when they’re smashing the moral lessons into your face. I was also scratching my head at why a superhuman being that was expressly designed to battle polluters loses his powers when he gets near pollution. It would seem that could make the villains job way, way easier.

I guess I just have a problem getting moral lessons from Ted Turner or maybe the fact that the showed worked entirely too hard to be politically correct. Whatever it was the show irritated me to no end.