.jpg?1238798531) By Jeremy Azevedo
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A cursory glance at the big movies of the summer paints a very telling picture of the way roles are written for women in cinema these days… |
Maybe the closest thing to a serious acting gig for a chick would be the recently released Woody Allen picture, “Vicky Cristina Barcelona”, which appears to exist so that we can all watch Scarlett Johansson and Penelope Cruz have a threesome with the guy from “No Country” because Woody Allen is finally too old to do it himself.
Javier and his friendos.
It seems like the days in which the “best actress” category at the Oscars (and their retarded stepbrother, the Golden Globes) were not a complete farce are long gone. Reese Witherspoon winning for sappy biopic like “Walk the Line”? Really? Or Hillary Swank for an over-promoted after school special like “Million Dollar Baby”? Jesus H. You have got to be kidding me. Where are all the serious actresses?
I, for one, am tired of all my movies being ruined by “actresses” that are perhaps better suited to print work, like Jessica Biel/Alba (same difference), pretentious broads like Kiera Knightly who over-value their own skill level, and bland TV actresses with no sex appeal like Katherine Hiegl. Who are this generation’s future legends? None of these women are likely to have a career that outlasts their 30th birthday.
Jessica Alba "acting" like a champion handjobbist.
With a little research I’ve come up with a list of ten actresses that may be just one great role away from timeless recognition. Or, at the very least, are reasonably tolerable.
These ten actresses have amassed an established body of work and have built a strong reputation with the Hollywood intelligentsia. While not the most bankable, they each have enough of a reputation to land a truly career making performance at any time.
Natalie Portman
Some dog letting Portman know what he thought of the new Star Wars movies.
Anyone that pull off an incredibly dark film like “Closer” while also performing in a genre defining dramedy (Garden State) and a summer blockbuster (Star Wars) AT THE SAME TIME is the shit, bottom line. Portman has a great attitude, is well educated, undeniably talented and doesn’t let it go to her head like it does most young actresses. I just hope she turns out to be a better director than Sophia Coppola when she makes the obvious transition that her ambitions seem to be leaning toward.
Christina Ricci
Whatever happened to good ol' trashy exploitation movie posters?
97-98 was her strongest period, in my opinion, with appearances in Buffalo ’66, Fear and Loathing, The Ice Storm, Pecker, and The Opposite of Sex, although her performances in “Monster” and “Black Snake Moan” proved that she was still relevant as an adult. As one of the most unique actresses working today, I feel she just needs to stay well away from the Speed Racer type films and stay in the independents until PT Anderson or the Cohen Brothers come calling. Also she should avoid giant sunglasses, they only amplify how strangely enormous her eyeballs are.
