# 10 Amy Acuff
High Jump



This beanpole’s interests include jumping over stuff, being hella tall and posing nude with alarming frequency!

#9 Jennie Finch
Softball



Unfortunately married to some asshole named “Daigle” or something, but is embarrassed to take his name. I don’t blame her.

#8 Alicia Sacramone
Artistic Gymnastics



A little buff for my tastes, but makes up for it in flexibility!

#7 Kerri Walsh and Misty May Treanor
Volleyball



I’m sure it hasn’t escaped anyone’s notice how Misty and Kerri can’t seem to keep their hands off of one another. And who can blame them?



Even George W can’t seem to resist the urge to smack that ass!

#6 Jenny Adams
100 Meter Hurdles



Technically didn’t even qualify for the Olympics this time, but who really cares? It’s not like anyone actually watches that shit anyway, amirite?

#5 Haley Cope
Swimming



Haley enjoys swimming, being hot and wishing Amanda Beard lived in another country so that she could be the tastiest babe on the US women’s swim team.

#4 Heather Mitts
Soccer



Cross your fingers for a repeat of the Brandy Chastain “shirt ripping” victory celebration from this one!

#3 Logan Tom
Volleyball



Logan was bioengineered by two nerdy virgins to be their sex slave, but instead taught them how to be men and score babes on their own. Or was that the plot to “Weird Science”? I forget.

#2 Alison Stokke
Pole Vault



This hot, barely-legal little POA will surely be like the Anna Kournikova of Pole Vaulting. Meaning that she’ll probably only dabble in the sport form here on in and will most likely also shack up with some closeted pop star with a weird mole before long.

#1 Amanda Beard
Swimming



Amanda Beard is probably the flyest honey to ever perform in the Olympics, swim in a pool, or be named after the most macho form of men’s facial hair ever invented.