Millions of years ago giant reptile (occasionally birdlike) monsters taller than your house once roamed the earth devouring each other until a giant asteroid (or ice age, whatever) came and wiped them completely out of existence. They followed no law or religion, and disappeared before the era of human thought and understanding. They remain a studied curiosity to this day and stand as the largest beasts ever willed out of creation in the history of this planet.
Dinosaurs are not only the greatest; they are also the best. Scientifically speaking, we're still trying to find out exactly how they looked, ate, and raised a nuclear family of 2 1/2 dinosaurs. But when you are 8 years old, facts don't matter to you. All you knew is that you loved dinosaurs because they were all at once the most frightening thing in the world and the most friendly. Or at least that's what cartoons told me.
Below is the full text of an epic poem that I wrote when I was 8 years old about dinosaurs. How I was able to muster up the patience and creativity to write this non-stop with no juice break I'll never know. But it exists as a great insight to why we all loved dinosaurs as kids. Enjoy.
Editor's note: For the sake of preserving the author's original intent we will correct none of the spelling errors. Enclosed are artist illustrations of what we think Duke and Jim looked like.
Dinosoars Are Great
by Samuel J. Superman Weller
Dinosoars are great
They stump and chew an grumble
The T Rex is the greatesst
in all the dino jungle
My mom once told me
Dinoz were all dead
but I found out they were not
cause I found a T Rex hiding
in my backyard pot.
my house has a big backyard
its the biggesst in the world
And I was playing Darkwng Duck
when I heard
shouting from behind a plant
so I took a look
it was a really big dinosoar
I swear it by the book!
his head wus high and his breath stunk
it smelled bad like puke
I asked him his name
he didnn't speak human
so I call him Duke
dukes scales were large and shiny
his claws were bigger than a plate
he gave me some dino food to eat
I was on a dino date
Duke and I becume besst friends
we ran and ran and ran
we took poops together in my moms pond
I wispered donnt tell dad
I saw Duke kills a rapetor once
I saw him kill a bear
I'm sure Duke could kill a robot
and the robot would not care
T Rexes are scary but they are glad
they like to dance and sing
my friends make fun when i do this
but duke does not he'ss not mean
Dinosoars are great
duke showed me all his freinds
one could fly through the air
I calls that one Jim
duke and Jim and me climbed a mountain
that looked just like my house
but when I tried to fly like Jim
I fell and got knocked out
my mom found me and we wented to the doctor
who said i ate bad things
and duke and jim they were not real!
my mom i did not believe
cause dinosoars are great
they real like me and you
and if you come to my backyard
you'd know that this is true
