Karissa Shannon on Denise Welch pulling her jogging bottoms down and exposing her buttocks: "I'm one of the most reserved people in the house. I do not do that type of stuff."
Karissa Shannon, pictured, buttocks in plain view.
Do you remember the SlutWalk? An event that saw over 3,000 women dress provocatively (think lots of leopard print and tights that looked like they'd been chewed on by a month-old labrador) and take to the streets in order to protest the fact that they shouldn't be judged or targetted just because of the way they dressed. It was a noble fight for a noble cause, beaten in the local headlines only by the strange flu virus going around that day that seemed to solely target 14-year-old boys, causing the largest amount of male school absences all year.
Anyway, Karissa Shannon was doing her bit for women's rights this week too, when she bravely fought for her right to not have TV host Denise Welch pull her pants down while she was dancing to 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun'. However, it seems that the public haven't taken Karissa's side in this debate and now the Playboy model and her twin sister are set to be evicted from the Celebrity Big Brother house tonight as part of a package deal.
But aren't you all being a little harsh on her? When she and her sister posed nude together for Playboy (phwoar, incest!) they probably got paid thousands of dollars, yet you all expect her to just whip her bumcheeks out in the house for free?! If an accountant went into the house I suppose you'd expect him to manage Gareth Thomas' finances too, would you? Who can blame her for not wanting to blithely flaunt that which affords her a living; if my arse didn't look like it belonged to one of those hairy mannequins you find in the Stone Age section of the museum I'd be picky about when and where I showed it off also.
Unfortunately Karissa had to go all high maintenance and threaten to sue Big Brother on account of the de-bagging incident and also because Frankie Cocozza "sexually harrasses" her. Which, let's face it, he probably does. When people call Frankie Cocozza a dick it's not only an insult but also a succinct description of his sole attribute as a human being.
Speaking of Frankie Cocozza, this whole debacle has now led to him becoming the favourite to win. How the bloody hell did that happen? You do realise what will happen if you allow him to win, don't you? He'll go from "that bloke with the shit hair who is in the papers sometimes" to "that bloke with the shit hair who was on Nevermind The Buzzcocks", or "that bloke with the shit hair who was on This Morning promoting his autobiography".
If this happens then it'll all be your fault, British public, and when he's sitting opposite Phillip Schofield at 11am on a Tuesday morning discussing how Holly Willoughby's breasts are "well bangin'", I hope you'll all feel proud of yourselves.
Follow @CraveOnlineUK, you hypocrits.