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Decoding the Facebook: Sex: Part 2

Find out what your friends are really trying to say this week on Facebook!

Whether you’re doing it or not, it’s hard to ignore the fact that sex is all around us. It’s in movies, on TV, everywhere you look – SEX! SEX! SEX! And why should social networking be any different? Chances are you’ve probably already seen some awkward Facebook posts about some random friends’s sex life, or lack thereof.

Unfortunately, like everyone else – your friends remain vague and obscure about what they are really posting about. Luckily, we here at CRAVE have developed a helpful little guide to help you figure out what your friends are really trying to say – especially in the bedroom!

 

What they’re really trying to say: Someone’s gonna be able to sleep next to you without their blanky and weeping uncontrollably.

 

What they’re really trying to say: After we make love for the first time I’m gonna introduce him to all thirty-six of my beautiful cats.

 

What they’re really trying to say: Guess who woke up this morning and it hurt to pee?

 

What they’re really trying to say: I know he cares about me because he prefers to mount me from behind…

 

What they're really trying to say: I spent the weekend masturbating to old episodes of True Blood.

 

What they’re really saying: I’m sick of sleeping at the battered women’s shelter.

 

What they’re really saying: Baby, tonight we’re gonna do some stuff involving a lot of pee.

 

What they’re really trying to say: A night of Olive Garden and an awkward hand-job while.

 

What they’re really trying to say: I never thought I’d cry after sex, but there only so much butt stuff I can take.

 

Tune into CRAVE every week for more Decoding the Facebook!