Photo: 4FR (Getty)
It’s summertime, and the last thing you want is to turn up the heat. But we’re not talking temperature when we list the 10 hottest beaches in the world. No, these swimming and sunbathing spots were selected using a complex scientific method to determine the quantity and quality of babes in attendance. Let’s crisscross the globe honoring the 10 beaches with the foxiest women, and if you feel your personal temperature rising, throw on a pair of shorts and take a swim.
Ipanema Beach, Brazil
Antonio Carlos Jobim wrote a rapturous tune about the “Girl from Ipanema” for a reason — Brazil’s sexiest beach has been notorious for decades. Widely regarded as producing the highest number of hot chicks per capita in South America, Brazil’s alluring ethnic melting pot produces a gourmet buffet of babes in every body type for your delectation. Keep in mind that competition is huge here, so if you’re not on the top of your game you may find yourself striking out all day long. One of the most popular activities is Footvolley, a sort of soccer-volleyball hybrid that separates the men from the boys in a hurry.
Venice Beach, CA
David Lee Roth wished they all could be California girls, and a day at Venice Beach will show you why. Women from all over the world migrate to the Golden State to try for a shot at the brass ring of Hollywood stardom, and while most of them don’t make it, you can’t fault them for trying. Sure, you’re not going to find too many all-natural fillies on the sand here, but the talent on display is tanned, trim and absolutely bodacious. If you’ve got an IMDB page — or can fake like you do — this is the beach for you. If you get tired of girl-watching, spend some time walking the boardwalk or fishing off the pier.
Boracay Island, Philippines
The Philippines has a bit of a bad reputation, but a trip to the gorgeous island of Boracay to sample the beach culture will make you forget everything you’ve heard as you ogle incredible babes from all over East Asia. The perfect white sands of this popular beach attract a diverse group of tourists who are a little less modest in their swimwear than locals. During the amihan season, the ocean water is almost motionless and smooth as glass, creating incredible scenic vistas. There are also a tremendous variety of leisure activities to enjoy around the area, from parasailing to horseback riding. One cool high-tech element is BoraPay, a cashless payment system that lets you charge drinks and stuff to a bracelet you wear on your wrist that links to your debit card.
Red Beach, Greece
This is going to sound unpleasantly mercenary, but the collapsing economy in Greece makes it a great destination for Americans looking to dazzle hot Mediterranean chicks. Red Beach, located in the town of Santorini, has long been a place for lovers to meet up and make out underneath the striking cliffs. There’s something indisputably romantic about this small and secluded beach, and because this is Europe the attitude toward toplessness is a little more relaxed than it is back home. Although it’s a popular vacation spot for couples, there is still a vibrant singles scene with a number of nightclubs lubricating everybody’s inhibitions away.
Panama City Beach, FL
Widely regarded as the best Spring Break beach in the world, Panama City gets wild as long as the weather is nice — which is almost all the time. Sandy, sugar-white expanses of beachfront attract tight-bodied cuties from across the spectrum of American higher education to strut their stuff in what sometimes seems like a constant party. The bar scene in Panama City ensures that the fun doesn’t end when the sun dips below the horizon. There’s a shared acceptance of the fact that whatever happens on Spring Break stays in Spring Break, so many girls here get a little bit wilder than they would at home.
Grande Plage, France
The beaches of Biarritz are widely known as some of the most erotic in Europe, and by far the hottest bodies can be found on the Grande Plage. There are other beaches that are more secluded and less crowded, but that’s not really what you’re going for here. The Grande Plage is a massive meat market of all kinds of girls, from hard-bodied surfers catching waves before peeling out of their wet suits to Parisian models putting the finishing touches on their all-natural tans. Because Biarritz is a popular vacation destination for many different demographics, some parts of the beach are more family friendly, but you’ll quickly scope out the singles scene and have a chance to deploy some of that high school French.
Main Beach, NY
The Hamptons scene is where all of New York’s moneyed socialites congregate on hot summer weekends, and you can bet they’re looking to blow off a little steam. All those hours at the gym pay off when urbanites strip down to their bikinis and take to the sand. Keep in mind that this isn’t a spot for the downwardly mobile — you’re going to pay to play in the Hamptons, and your competition is likely to include scions of the rich and famous as well as studly hunks bused in to tutor kids in lacrosse. That said, the quality of girl here is more than worth the effort, and if you play your cards right you might be able to snag a sugar mommy on the side.
Bondi Beach, Australia
The sexy history of Bondi Beach dates back to 1951, when actress Jean Parker debuted an itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny polka-dot bikini and was dragged off by the police for it. Needless to say, the rules have loosened up a little bit since then, and now Sydney’s main party beach is home to hotties in all manner of tiny outfits. Locals have a bit of a mixed relationship with Bondi — some lament that the stretch of sand has become too commercialized and claim that other Aussie beaches are better, but you can’t deny the sheer volume of insanely hot girls Down Under.
Lake Havasu, AZ
Does a beach need to be on the ocean? Not if the dime pieces that congregate there are as hot and ready to party as the girls at Lake Havasu. This man-made lake was created in the 1930s with the building of Parker Dam, turning the Colorado River into a dependable source of hydroelectric power for the area. The secondary effect was, of course, creating a venue for some of the wildest parties the world has ever seen, both on the shore and on roving boats full of hot chicks. Memorial Day weekend is Ground Zero for debauchery here, with girls as far as the eye can see stripping off their tops and frolicking in the clear blue water.
Plage de Tahiti, France
One of the most notorious nude beaches in the world, the Plage de Tahiti in St. Tropez helped kick-start the topless sunbathing craze in the ’60s with the Brigitte Bardot film “And God Created Woman,” and remains a prime destination for beautiful people to show everything they’ve got to the sun. This is a hot spot for celebrities looking to bare it all, so if you’ve got a Mr. Skin subscription you might see some familiar flesh. Things can get incredibly decadent around here, as serious high-rollers blow fat wads of cash on champagne and other substances. If you do manage to pick up a hottie, there’s a hidden hotel at the beach with just 13 rentable rooms. Might want to book it way in advance.