Naked South Carolina Woman Tries To Break Into Church Because She Thought Jesus Was Chasing Her

Drugs are bad, mmmkay?

Tommy Gimlerby Tommy Gimler
Photo: boygovideo (Getty)

They say the lord works in mysterious ways, but this is pretty ridiculous.

According to ABC Columbia, a 43-year-old South Carolina woman said she tried to break into a church Sunday only because she thought somebody was chasing her through the woods.

That somebody? You guessed it: Jesus Christ.

naked woman in church

Police said Teresha Dawn Frick told them she tried getting into Bedon Baptist Church in Walterboro Sunday because Jesus was not only chasing her but also…wait for it…shooting at her. She then told them she was “smoking crack and taking molly,” which is something that totally makes this story understandable.

Frick was treated at a nearby hospital for cuts and scratches that she more than likely sustained while running from her savior in the woods. She was then taken to jail and charged with disturbance of worship service.

Maybe it’s just me, but in the story of 43-year-old Teresha Dawn Frick, Jesus chasing a woman through the woods, Jesus shooting at a human being and a naked woman trying to break into a church, that fact that Frick is only 43 is probably the most surprising part.

Well, he was having a good time: Naked Man On Way Too Many Drugs At EDC Stage Dives Headfirst Onto Ground Below