The Race Between ‘The Freeze’ And A Cocky Braves Fan Is By Far The Best Sports Video Of The Year

The only thing faster than this guy was me in my first threesome.

Tommy Gimlerby Tommy Gimler
Photo: Twitter

Odds are you missed the Mets-Braves game Friday night because you were busy doing anything else, but that means you missed what has to be the best between innings promotion we’ve seen since somebody in Milwaukee decided to dress up a few peeps as sausages and have them run around the diamond.

The Braves dressed up former college track star and current grounds crew member Nigel Talton as “The Freeze” and then gave his opponent the kind of head start that is usually reserved for six-year-old kids or people missing a leg. And then this happened:

The Race Between ‘The Freeze’ And A Cocky Braves Fan Is By Far The Best Sports Video Of The Year

And that, guys, is why you never celebrate until the job is done. I mean, just because the girl gets naked first doesn’t mean you can break out into song and dance just yet, as all it takes is just one look at your tiny pecker and those clothes will go right back on before she runs down the stairs laughing while tweeting her friends.

According to The Washington Post, Talton ran for Iowa Wesleyan, where he broke a 23-year-old record during his freshman year before transferring to Shorter University. He said that his ultimate goal is to run for Team USA at the 2018 world indoor championships in England, which shouldn’t be a problem if he includes this video on his resume.

The second-best race video we have ever seen: Illinois Fair Will Thankfully Still Hold ‘Monkeys Riding Dogs’ Races Despite Objections