Single Guy Confessions: I Tried Dating An Amateur Pole Dancer And Things Took A Weird Turn

What goes up...must fall down (in the most horrid fashion).

Matt Branhamby Matt Branham
Photo: arturkurjan (Getty)

A good man supports the beautiful woman he loves no matter what her latest obsession might be. So when she comes to you with the idea of pole dancing classes, you’ll support the shit out of that. But I’m here to tell you, I tried dating an amateur pole dancer (several, in fact) and it’s not as great as you might imagine.

But you have to try. She supports you spending your entire Sunday (actually, fall) watching football so you can play in a fantasy league with your friends (try saying that last part out loud without feeling too ashamed to call yourself a man).

In the long run, it might pay off, and you’ll essentially be dating an untarnished stripper who only strips and dances for you. But the first hours are rocky ones. Just don’t let her give up, or you’ll have woken up to a bruised and battered woman too many days in a row for nothing.
We hope you love your woman a lot, gents, because dating a beginner pole dancer has some sick symptoms that make them difficult to love. But, you know, Jimi Hendrix was probably a loud little terror early on and that worked out.

Single Guy Confessions: I Tried Dating an Amateur Pole Dancer and Things Took a Weird Turn

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