Photo: Peter Dazeley (Getty Images)
When it comes to the topic of getting married, men tend to avoid it any way they can. However, couples who have been together for a long time should talk about the prospect as much as possible and find out if that would be the right move for them. Obviously, everyone is different, and not everyone is comfortable in a marriage, so you need to consider everything with your partner before making such an important step. In order to help you make such a life-changing decisions, here is a list of things that will change with this step.
First of all, you need to address the matter of money. Yes, the earnings should never be the most important part of any relationship, but it’s far from irrelevant. Getting married also means that everything you earn goes into a joint account you can both use. At this point, you stop thinking about your individual needs and start worrying about the well-being of the household. This becomes quite obvious with the arrival of children. So, one big change is that you now have a lot more money but are expected to act more responsible.
If you think that you will remain the same after marrying, you’re sorely mistaken. Living with another person in a formal unity is truly a character-changing experience. In order to make it all work, you need to adapt to each other and change whenever necessary. We’re all different and it’s unlikely that you will find someone who is completely the same as you. Another word for marriage would, no doubt, be a compromise. This is perfectly natural, necessary, and even desirable, as you can help each other become better people in time.
Another important thing to consider, regardless of how long you’ve been a couple, concerns your comfort zones. In most cases, getting married means spending a lot more time with that someone who will witness your daily routine. As the time passes, your comfort zones with each other expand and you’ll feel more like close friends than a couple. This is normal and nothing to worry about. You just need to work on keeping the passion alive, despite this seemingly friendly relationship you have going on.
No one is perfect, obviously. We all have our unique flaws that make us who we are. The thing is, in a marriage, these individual character flaws really come to life. As people get older, both their virtues and flaws seemingly amplify, especially in a marriage. That is why it’s important to think about them before marrying (if necessary sit down and make a list). The good sides of your partner will keep you going at times when the bad sides seem to prevail.
One of the most common questions people ask about marriage is – how often do married couples have sex? There is, of course, no universal answer to this question, as every couple is different. Two common misconceptions though are that you will have incredible amounts of sex (since you’re both together all the time) or that you will have no sex (as you’ve seen it happen with numerous old couples). The truth is somewhere in between. The best way to ensure a healthy sex life even in a marriage is to work on it actively and keep the passion going.
At the end of the day, you need to take all these things into consideration and decide for yourself whether getting married is a smart idea at that moment. How do you feel about it?