‘Angry Birds: The Movie’ is Seriously Happening

The game about quadriplegic animals and ineffectual carpentry is becoming a multimedia franchise.

William Bibbianiby William Bibbiani

To paraphrase Sally Struthers… Do you like Angry Birds? Sure, we all do! The popular iPhone game has been downloaded more than 250 million times, spawned (hatched?) both sequels and home games, and now, despite nobody actually demanding it, it's en route to a theater near you. For the record, the story is about a group of quadriplegic birds whose eggs are stolen by green quadriplegic pigs who dwell in poorly constructed houses. 

Yeah, that screenplay's going to write itself. Come to think of it, the last time a videogame with such a flimsy excuse for a plot was turned into movie the result was Super Mario Bros. It's going to be very interesting to learn which filmmakers are willing to touch it with a ten-foot pole.

That ten-foot pole, by the way, belongs to David Maisel, the former chairman of Marvel Studios. Maisel successfully turned the comic book company into a Hollywood giant, spearheading such films as Iron Man and The Incredible Hulk. It stands to reason that such a man would have a better chance than most of turning Rovio, the company behind Angry Birds, into the Pixar Studios it claims it wants to be. Of course the difference is that Marvel comic books had actual characters, plot lines and concepts that make at least a modicum of sense.

According to Variety, Maisel "has already begun conversations with screenwriters and directors to tackle the Angry Birds feature," which Maisel will executive produce.

Anything is possible, we suppose, but this seems like a stretch to us. Angry Birds is a powerful brand name with a built-in audience… which prefers its entertainment to be short, plotless and interactive. So excuse us for being skeptical.

Crave Online will be back with more Angry Birds news as soon as we're done playing the new sequel, Melancholy Ocelots.